Changes, Changes....

Lots of different changes going on and have been going on here. A few days before my scheduled surgery for Uterine Cancer, Dad starts to fail fast....he got sick with congestion and had to use an antibiotic. He couldn't walk. Amy moved in for the month to take care of him while I recovered. She was exhausted the first week and I thought I was going to lose her out of just being worn out. I heard her in a conversation with her friend about how in the world did Mom do this all the time. LOL It ain't easy! After thinking about it for awhile I wondered what was the difference in me taking care of Dad and someone else. I figured out it had to do with commitment. If one is not committed, nothing can happen. You just do it because your mind has been set TO DO IT! Period. That's how I do it. The other alternative is a nursing home and I just can't do that. Since the surgery I have wondered how in the world I would do this IF I got worse and couldn't take care of Dad. I suppose at that point I would have to reconsider my choices. However, I am NOT at that point so no considering is necessary. I have been told by my Oncologist that the cancer is gone with the surgery. They took it all....and it was inside the uterus. All tests on the 20 lymph nodes that they removed were cancer FREE.
So let's move on to the rest of my life, shall we?

That doesn't mean I am strong again....I would have to travel back in time for that.
It does mean that I will NOT be having chemo or radiation taking up my time.

All I have to do now is to get strong, heal up the wounds and go back to running the house as I have been used to doing.

I think Dad was having his troubles at the same time as mine because he was worried about his own fate. What's going to happen to me if Wendy dies, or can't take care of me? I KNOW that's what was going through his mind because he said it to me privately in one of his dementia states.

Only when he actually saw me home and walking did he start to move and realize HE might be okay. It was noticeable....the Senior center nurse had suggested that he was concerned for himself in the situation. A few others figured it out as well.

Now he is over that slump, I am back to pushing him to move his butt and not pretend to be helpless. LOL Like Amy says, Uh oh, here comes Mom so you better get moving."

Dad would lay in bed all day and do nothing if not for me prompting him to get up and get moving. He would just sleep the entire rest of his life away. He would sit in that wheel chair and NOT get out if I didn't make him do it. He would say I can't a zillion times just to try and convince me he can't unless I told him I didn't want to hear those words. I use an old saying Mom used to bring up when the words I can't was said in her presence. They wouldn't make sense to people who never heard her but Dad KNOWS what I mean. That's usually all it takes to get him to have the will to move just one more day! That's all I ask.

So from not being able to move a few days before the surgery to the point I had to call home health in to take care of him...........to the point he is now walking with his walker short distances once again AND he actually stayed awake during the whole hour of church last week.......well, that's a huge step.

I have bigger steps in mind for him but one doesn't dare tell him ahead of time....no no no, that will give him time to find an excuse NOT TO DO IT! I must be one step ahead of him and sometimes two.

A Trip to the Eye Doctor...

Dad had cataract surgery about 10 days ago. Everything went perfect....well, at least from my point of view. Dad was behaving badly after the surgery. I never saw him act like he did that day. Right after the surgery he came out of the operating room in full force of I am not going to do anything anyone says. I would suppose the drug Versed had something to do with the attitude. He has had the drug before, each time he get a steroid shot in his lower back....but for some reason it affected him differently.
The nurse asked him some questions and he basically told her what she could do with those questions. LOL I mean to tell you it was a riot. She asked me what he said and I told her she was better off not knowing. He wouldn't let me give him something to drink and then he grabbed it from me and squeezed it like a little kid. Naturally it was one of those collaspable juice boxes and it spilled all down his sweat pants. He had enough nerve to say to me, "NOW look what you've done!" My mouth dropped because I was speechless to that. The lady across the room couldn't help but laugh as she had heard everything. He didn't care. LOL So we get ready to go out the door and a couple employees helped us. Dad was in the wheel chair and we were parked just outside but we had to go through a couple doors. He wasn't about to move. He kept asking me where were we going. I told him home. He wasn't having anything to do with it. Furthermore those nurses and doctors were a bunch of hoodlums and some sort of gang. I mean to tell you I was about to pee my pants as we all laughed at what was running loose out of his mouth. So finally with some tugging we got to our car door...now he is in the wheelchair still and the nurses are trying to get him to stand up.....hahaha I had to laugh at their effort because he wasn't budging. RARELY do I get to see Dad act like this in front of strangers. He doesn't want anyone outside of a few people to know that he can carry on like this if he so chooses.
Finally I told them to go back inside....I will take care of this but they said they had to stay with him until he is seated in the car for insurance purposes. I said, Okay, but you are going to be here awhile and last I looked, you had a room full of patients. LOL Well that did it, they went back inside while I handled this situation.

I told him that he had better get his butt in that seat or I was going to have to carry him out of the wheelchair and if I do that I was going to strain my back and probably never be able to walk again. {lol} Hey, ya gotta do what ya gotta do.

He got his butt up asking questions the entire time of why this and why that, but I just said get in the car and I will answer all that later when you come to your senses.

The gals came running outside to get the wheelchair asking me what I said to get him to move. I just said when he asks like a little kid, he gets talked to like a little kid. They laughed and said they had never had anyone to act like that before.
Leave it to Dad to be first!!

All the way home he threateded to jump out of the car...he was going to the cops cause now he was blind and those Doctors were crooks and they were planning some takeover. LORDIE! I was about to pull my hair out....but at least my car has the child locks!!! He wasn't going anywhere today.

I took him home and put him to bed and told him to sleep it off. LOL
What a day and thank goodness we were only getting one eye done!!